the 72nd hour..and i thought it would end already but it was just a careless assumption..now time still goes by and it looks like silence will be prolonging is stay with me..its been a while now since i had a real conversation..after some argument 3 days back, my life is now quieter as i spend most of my time in my room..as if the internet would help..as if the stack of PS2 games on my shelf would help..yesterday i was online the whole day and i realized the irony when i was having an online conversation with Mou Jian via MSN..he was appearing offline..i had almost 60 people online on the contact list but i am chatting with a person that appears offline..i expressed my irony to Mou Jian but then i never really expected anyone to understand..so anywho..that was the first 48 hours that went by..
the next 24 hours, today..nothing was getting better and everything seem so familiar to me..the silence..the endless paranoia that filled the void in my mind..it was almost as if someone hit the rewind button on my boring little life to two years back..two years back..at around this time of the year..all i had with me was questions, silence and a hole in my heart..this time..the silence was almost similar...waking up to a day where everything is stuck on a loop..everything i do seem to repeat itself after 3 days now..all this quiet and alone time isn't good for me..i think too much..people say that..but i myself know that they were right..i do think too much and it bothers me..
last week i finished reading a book, "Twilight" and i have to admit, its a good book..and this is coming from a person who do not read much..when i was done..i managed to get hold of the second book, "New Moon"..i got it precisely 3 days ago, and i'm glad i have it with me..without it, i would be left with too much time to think bout stuff..now..i realize that the end of the book is fast approaching and i fear of what i could do nxt to fill the recent emptiness that hit my life..everyday i read slower..hoping that the book would last longer but im down to my last 150 page or so..
the 72nd hour..i see it going to the 96th hour..tomorrow is going to be a very quiet day..i believe i will finish the book by tomorrow..tonight ill try to sleep early or do something else..who would have thought..after 2 years..that i could possibly go back there again..but the effect isn't whole and it hasn't got hold of me just yet..but the silence...the thought of it burns the insides of me..i really do hope this streak ends soon..there is suppose to be an outing this friday..but really ive never been without a proper conversation for 72 hours..or perhaps 96 hours..i mite look and sound like a zombie on Friday..
cyen/tristan
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